A university coursework piece by user Salmonmarine on Facepunch Forums, originally posted in this thread: link
Two users posted the following replies:
It looks like a generic worker, I'd say give more stuff to make it look more battle-oriented maybe, and definitely something that makes it unique
I'm gonna be honest, I don't think the design itself is that villanous. It's a cool design for sure, and well done as always, but hardly menacing or evil in any sense of the word.
Which I built upon in my brief critique:
The orange signifies worker, to me. Remember those common cultural icons we see wearing bright orange suits like that - construction workers and their hi-visibility orange jackets, the Rebel Alliance pilots from Star Wars. A uniform that unites them as part of a group. I don't think that particular colour when applied to that sort of clothing is something we associate with high-level leadership and villainy. Head looks quite villainous, with the 'dangerous' shape language (spikes often used to show that something is dangerous or evil, think Sauron, Darth Maul, the overall triangular shape of Darth Vader, satan's horns, etc) and those triangular, pointed eyes (visible in the second one across) but in the first and third images the sense of 'evil' is diminished somewhat where the actual face is concerned, because we don't see the sharp eye very clearly and, esp. in number 1, we can't really see any sharp spikes. No. 1 sort of looks more frog/gungan like from that angle.
An important note is the focus on a silhouette that reads well in the round - ensuring that from a variety of angles our design is displaying the desired character and message. BUT what if this character's body did show the villainy that it was supposed to - would it matter if the head didn't show much villainy in it's overall shape from the front-on view? We'd have the rest of the body to read and would also likely see the character from a variety of angles. Something to ponder. Simon Fetscher
Born Sweden 1990
Art school - Folkuniversitetets Art College in Gothenburg
Illustration School at Berghs School of Communication in Stockholm
Clients have included
Calmino group AB
Mystikal Wear
Dejossy
Sun Rise
He posted an image on the Conceptart.org Facebook page. I did a brief critique. Unfortunately the aim of the design wasn't provided, so I had to do a more general critique.
My critique:
Looking neat! The body and wings feel quite bug-like to me though, and I'd love to see this reflected better by the legs. I think it would suit it much better to have legs that make it appear as though it would almost hop like a flea into the air as it takes off. I'm also concerned about the lack of a dominant focal point. Personally, I'd make the cockpit at the front more visually dominant and recognisable, although if any of the far more experienced artists around here want to correct me please do!
His reply
Thanks for the crits You definitely have a point, but for the cockpit I actually wanted a little less attention in the front, and let the rest of the ship be more interesting. I dont know if that was a good call, but I gave it a try haha. Always great to hear what others have to say! Thanks
New process for this project - set definite attributes early one, don't strive for absolute textual perfection. Make some quick calls regarding materials, etc, then move on and start making. Information like 'is it copper or steel' can be either provided by the AD or can be a part of the material/colour variations you do later on. I don't have to define that for myself right now when there is no absolute answer or if the answer would take excessive time to find out.
So the task is:
Design Detritus' Cooling Helmet as created by Lance Constable Cuddy. Helmet created in the book 'Men at Arms' and plays a part in trying to keep Detritus' brain cool in this book, Jingo. Information can be found in Men at Arms and in Jingo, as well as in online Wiki resources.
Use Kirby's vision of Detritus as a character base; that is, if we require a character on which to place the helmet or to design for (create aesthetic unity between character and prop) then use Kirby's rendering. Imagine we've been given a character shape already to make these designs for.
Notes from Men at Arms
There was a hammering noise from somewhere inside. Cuddy had come in ten minutes before with a bag of tools, a couple of helmets and a determined expression. Colon was damned if he knew what the little devil was working on.
Cuddy coughed. 'These big bits are cooling fins, see? Painted black. I glommed a clockwork engine off my cousin, and this fan here blows air over—' He stopped when he saw Colon's expression.
Notes from Jingo
Technically they were all in uniform, too, except that mostly they weren't wearing the same uniform as anyone else. Everyone had just been sent down to the armoury to collect whatever fitted, and the result was a walking historical exhibit: Funny–Shaped Helmets Through the Ages.''
It took half an hour to get to the top of the dune. The sand had been stamped down but, even as Vimes watched, the wind caught the particles and nibbled away at the prints.
'Camel tracks,' said Vimes. 'Well, camels don't go all that fast. Let's––' 'I think Detritus is having real trouble, sir,' said Carrot. The troll was standing with his knuckles on the ground. The motor of his cooling helmet sounded harsh for a moment in the dry air, and then stopped as the sand got into the mechanism. 'Feelin' fick,' he muttered. 'My brain hurts.' 'Quick, hold your shield over his head,' said Vimes. 'Give him some shade!' 'He's never going to make it, sir,' said Carrot. 'Let's send him back down to the boat.' 'We need him! Quick, Cheery, fan him with your axe!'
Extracted information;
Made of two or more seperate helmets
Has got black cooling fins on - maybe look at heat sinks - 'big bits'
A clockwork engine - maybe the engine a single piece
Has got fans on
Mechanism susceptible to sand - may be exposed to elements or un-shielded
Watch uniform generally scruffy and mismatched - so no one particular style we have to adhere to
When designing provide the AD with a range of interesting and unique designs
What if focus more on 'cool' and generating unique ideas for helmets before diving in to a specific set of attributes rather than agonising over what to focus on and what not to focus on immediately - for this one try a different process. when it comes to critical analysis, we can think about the specifics
Plan for this one -
lay down some ground rules and do a quick brainstorm
do a variety of different characters and styles - we are defining an overall direction
get the dice art director to pick one and then write up the desired style, character, etc
do variations on this now thinking more about design theory to express the desired character and style
narrow down to five that I think are the most successful and interesting
show them to the AD and have one to carry on with
final refinements if necessary and if time allows
colour, material
render
Step 1 -Ground rules:
NOT scary or villainous - it's an attempt to be a respectable watchman's helmet
Based on one or more old armoured helmet styles
Contains a cooling fan driven by clockwork
Hand made and a 'frankenstein' - it's obviously not factory made. Cobbled together bits and pieces. Level of polish is uncertain.
Good advice for me regarding my current idea of 'I have to design and think in the perfect way to be in the industry', which I need to get into my head is a fallacious and unrealistic way of thinking
Talk about design decisions on the above images and also presentation if applicable.
Starting to look at presentation strategies.
How do I want to present? There are a range of options
Presenting a bunch of work 'in-house' to the production team on the project (design-savvy people), more technical information and less emphasis on 'polish'
Presenting a bunch of work in a pitch to producers or investors - would perhaps prefer 'wow' images
Presenting work in a catch-up meeting with producers or investors - deeper into the project, progress of work
Presenting at a convention or expo - to get people interested in related merchandise
Presenting in the lobby of the design office for clients and employees to see
Presenting on the wall in the design space to inform other team members and give a space where things can be talked over in an informal standing meeting
Things to consider include the arrangement and presentation of the images within the space as well as the arrangement and presentation images' individual pages and how appropriate these methods of presentation are for the specific chosen presentation context.
Talked with Rebecca - should think about it as a balance between presenting in a way appropriate for our context and presenting in a way that's appropriate for an end-of-degree show. So it's alright to present fancier and tidier than you would in your actual context.
There's a sense that if you're presenting a solution to a client in person, you'll talk about the process, what you did, why you did it, alternate things you looked at, etc, to give context and a well reasoned explanation of why you made the choices you did. I am only doing a physical presentation though.
Research:
Source 1
Some research I did in May of last year can be found at this link. I had posted on the Conceptart.org website about how concept art is displayed. Jeffx99 replied. Jeffx99 has done video game work before, but not since 2002 (link to his biographic page).
Here's what he said:
There are different levels of "concept art", with different purposes, audiences and presentation methods. Most often it is displayed on a screen, printed out and put on boards or tacked up on a dedicated wall in what is often called a "war room". Concept work can also be presented via PowerPoint or some other projection during a review meeting.
Concept art runs the gamut from simple sketches between AD and artist all the way up to what are called "production paintings" which help set the mood and tone for a project. There's a lot of variation between and whatever makes most sense is how it is displayed.
So basically the answer is concept art is displayed in a variety of ways. And yes, "animatics" are a good way to show some things.
Edit: You should always work at print resolutions because most of the time it will be printed at some point, either to put on a wall, a board or to be included in a design doc.
I said to him:
is there a definitive summary of the job(s) a concept artist would face, how the concept artist operates in the workplace, etc? I'm trying to find out as much as I can about the job through searching the forums and running it through Google but everybody seems to have slightly different ideas.
To which he replied
There are different ideas because it is always very different. Studios are different, teams are different, individual projects are different, genres are different, entertainment forms are different...so roles, responsibilities and the workplace are different across companies, projects and artists.
Source 2
I've also gotten in touch with Pati AhSue who did a similar project during BVA4 a couple of years ago to see what knowledge he can give me from his time at Weta.
No reply from Pati yet.
Source 3 - on-the-page examples from various artists
FZD images from his website
Images from FZD students
talk about presentation here
http://simonfetscherweekly.blogspot.se/
From Paul Richard's site:
Death armor by Brian Jones with callouts.
Definitions: 'Callouts' - arrows and notes that further define or explain certain elements
A brief look at the use of callouts in Industrial Design sketches with links to Industrial Designer Rhett Miles
http://www.core77.com/blog/sketchnotes/a_better_way_to_do_drawing_callouts_25311.asp
Source 4 - Feng Zhu Design School 2013 graduation show
Spatial layout of presentation is really tight - it looks like they have a tiny amount of room to show in so there's no wall showing at all! Looks like a range of images from their individual projects, with both 3/4 view designs as well as production painting
Source 5 - Hobbit Production Videos
Stills from Peter Jackson's video blogs of The Hobbit production. Artists John Howe and Alan Lee showing Peter Jackson some work. Not sure of the exact context of the meeting, or whether it's staged for the purposes of the blog. But we can see what looks like a work space.
Images all blurred out in the video for non-disclosure reasons. Looks like it could be pencil drawings sitting beside final paintings. OR could be drawings and photographs/references from locations.
Source 6 - Logo Design Presentation
5 Tips for Presenting your Design Concept (logo design) by Nathan Sarlow of CobaltCow (link)
Not all that useful in terms of visual presentation advice; mainly just stuff regarding conversation and interaction with client.
A focus on minimalism in presentation of logos - white space around the logos so that they can be seen without distraction. Relevant in my context? Perhaps when presenting to somebody who doesn't really understand art and ideas (a non-artistic client) then minimalism would be best. But perhaps art-directors are able to see and process the ideas much better even when given a quite full and information-heavy canvas with many callouts
As a designer you can leave out or change things that the client requested if you feel that it was detrimental to the design. Always explain WHY you left the element out so that ensure that you appear intelligent and thoughtful and not lazy.
Side note - interesting point about branding - the logo doesn't have to carry the entire message - let it work as a team with other aspects of the branding.
Clarification of Context
Looking at the work I've produced and how it's already layed out and rendered, I've decided it feels much more like an in-house presentation of designs, likely to other members of the design team.
Spoke to Glen, the producer from my internship and he agreed, saying that for a pitch to investors he thought you'd more likely create a film poster or similar image.
So the chosen context is:
prop designs presented to the rest of the design team and art director for discussion. The stage following this would be revision and then, I believe in most cases, the creation of diagrammatic top, side, bottom and front views of each design for prop-makers or 3D modelers to create the actual object for use in the film.
Presentation Discussion: 1. Mounting on Boards
Norman Foster manually placing boards on an easel in architecture pitch
However, mounting costs and TIME taken to mount is gonna be difficult for me - 2 weeks left and maybe not enough time to get everything polished and printed with labor day taking up that monday as well ?
Thoughts:
Implications of foamboard - more work goes into it, looks more presentable, perhaps implies a more upmarket presentation to a group of people you want to impress with the images and presentation itself - clients, investors, etc, rather than a group of technical artists who are only really fussed about the designs.
However - technical artists would perhaps need top and side views, etc, rather than only 3/4 views.
What we have - some images that present the design itself outside of the immediate context of its use - the focus of the image is primarily on the visual design primarily and not on its placement in a wider world.
Fran idea - if I want to work in a real-world contextual message, I could have a couple on the wall, have on propped up on a desk and then one in one of those large black zip-up portfolio bags. Sort of really literally gives the message that these are images that will be taken and displayed to clients.
Lecturer feedback:
Fran - foamboard mounting has a definite 'design' feel to it
Rebecca - foamboard feels too high-school
2. Page Layout
Our aim is to provide as much information to the design team as possible.
So clarifying things like
Materials the objects are made of - reference image cutouts or text indications
Any hard-to-understand or fine detail - blown-up detail
Any function or moving parts or transformations - drawings of object in other states
Scale - relative scale with objects or a clearly defined measurement
Discussing the design of the figures
Some points (the robot or human) raised by classmates. This is a mixture of my own thoughts and those of my classmates. PRIMARILY my own thoughts.
Trying out a 3 point method of talking about the design - 'what is the issue' 'how has the issue been created' 'how can we solve it'.
Lights on side of face are a dominant focal point and draw attention away from the other more important parts of the face. Why do we need to look at the other detail? In the context of this design, it's a character - the eyes are typically (I think) a focal point of characters, as the shape and position, etc, of them expresses a lot about the character. Biological basis here with our social group and communication.
How is this effect created: They are dominant focal points here because of contrast (bright, high value blue points on a dark red field: colour and tonal contrast) as well as their use as unique elements on the figure - we only see these lights on the cheek, therefore they stand out.
How can we solve it: reduce the contrast in terms of tone and hue. Repeat the blue lights on other areas of the character to reduce the visual weight of them - water them down, make them less unique, therefore reduce their power.
Use visual devices (higher contrast, placement of detail, leading lines etc) to more clearly bring the front of the face into dominance.
Other thoughts: I feel also like maybe having such a dominant focal point on the side of the face disrupts the reading of the face - confuses in the mind of the viewer where the center line of the face is.
Robot or human? The arms give a robotic feel to the character, as though we're looking at a droid. The head, however looks human. A bit of an unclear non unified communication of the nature of the character through the design itself. That is, even if we took this character in isolation away from the environment and out of the pose it's in now, it might not be clear whether it's a robot or human just by looking at it.
How is this effect created: the really skinny arms with robotic joints suggest a robotic structure underneath. It just looks as though we wouldn't be able to fit whatever mechanics are connected to the joints AS WELL AS a human arm in that space, esp. when we look at the left elbow of the figure nearest us. The head on the other hand feels quite human - it's very helmet-like. Designed for containing a head - correctly placed eyes, a mouthpiece, etc.
How can we solve it: define whether it's a robot or a human. If a robot, then the head would need some sort of redesign to make it less helmet-like and more robotic. If a human, then the arms would need reworking to be plausible and the joints would need rethinking. At the moment they look as though they look as though they facilitate robotic movement rather than underlying human movement. Look at other examples of how joints are managed in sci-fi suits.
A feeling of a lack of visual unity between the different parts of the design, which results in a sense of mismatched parts and disjointed aesthetic. The communication implications of this? Unsure at the moment.
How is this effect created? Shape language unclear. Face looks sinister due to bug-like eyes and small, unhuman mouth surrounded by angular forms. Inconsistent shape language too - the angular, plated shapes of the upper arms meet the rounded medieval/football shoulder pads in a way that clashes. The idea of repeating forms to create an overall and unified aesthetic hasn't taken place enough. The sudden introduction of rounded shoulders also makes them appear smaller and less masculine in comparison to the rest of the form, highlighting this sudden lack of masculinity and giving them a smaller, feminine look.
How can we solve this: refine the shoulders and other rounded forms (head, etc), look at more angular forms for these areas.
Bear in mind that if we are required to shoot these characters or treat them as friends, they may subscribe to an already existing aesthetic that we've already been exposed to and that has already been constructed as good or bad. So in the overall scheme of design, as long as the character design subscribes to what's been set up as the 'uniform' of good or bad in the visual story then we might already consider it to successfully denote moral orientation
